Bedtime Routines For Adults
Last week, I wrote about my own overwhelm. Whenever I work myself through an intense emotion or problematic situation, I look through a psychology lens and become an observer, in this case of my daily life. I mentioned in that post that one glaring area stood out: mealtimes. Mealtimes were the Achilles' heel of our household, where we perpetually fell short. And so, I avoided the temptation of sweeping changes and committed us to making improvements in that arena—more on our progress later. And while I’ve promised myself and my husband no sweeping changes or drastic schedule overhauls, I have made a deliberate decision to prioritize personal well-being, particularly with my bedtime rituals. My hope is that a better night’s sleep will create a better morning and day for all.
Now, I have to acknowledge that the internet’s morning routines are idealistic and frankly, out of control. Is everyone really waking up at 3:30 AM a la Mark Wahlberg and fasting and working out and eating?? While an indulgent 3 hours to myself in silence sounds beautiful, I’m going to need to take that sleeping- most likely not by myself and not in complete silence but still, sleeping. What I do have the bandwidth for is some subtle shifts in the evening that support my general functioning as a human being and hopefully create some space the next morning.
The evening, for me, holds a peculiar allure, feeling like the only piece of time I that I own. Therefore, I resist going to sleep and must psyche myself up for my own bedtime. So, if you're in this boat and would like to come a bit closer to an ideal morning routine, consider your nighttime routines and tailor some of my practices for yourself. All of which, I find to be very realistic and sustainable.
Putting away tech
Firstly, there's the matter of technology. For me, it's my phone whose bedtime needs to be 9 PM. I’ve been placing it in another room to avoid the temptation of late-night scrolling. As for entertainment, I've learned to steer clear of gripping TV series in the late night like "The Handmaid's Tale," “YOU,” "The Haunting of Hill House," (damn bent-neck lady still pops out of my subconscious to say Heyy). If it’s not lighter fare like "Outer Banks," "Flip or Flop," or "Emily in Paris" I needa go!
2. Supplements
Next, supplements really support me in winding down. Right now, I'm finding magnesium to give me a sense of calm and readiness for bed. In the past I’ve taken CBD - the bath bombs are pretty fun or I’ll drink Chamomile tea. I encourage everyone to research what works best for them.
3. Skincare
Then, there's skincare—while I love skincare products, I am pretty resistant to my skincare routine. I've simplified my routine to the bare essentials, ensuring that I have time to wash my face before the kids' bedtime, sometimes I do it at 5 PM. I will actually avoid bedtime because I don’t want to wash my face. Having it done avoids any excuses for procrastination.
4. Reading fiction
What better way to wind down than with a good book? I know there’s blue light but I do use a Kindle which makes it easier for me to access library books. One less errand is everything right now. I make it a point to read fiction every single night, whether it’s 5 minutes or 45 minutes and this distracts the part of my brain that doesn’t want to sleep. And here's a radical thought: if a book fails to captivate your interest, bid it farewell. It’s ok, it really is. Similarly, if a book’s suspense keeps you awake and reading, feel free to peek at the ending—it's a controversial move, I know, but this one allows me to stay with a book. Knowing the end I can follow the journey over the next couple of weeks, without sacrificing precious sleep. I do it with tv series too… I know, I probably just lost so many people’s respect.
5. Mise En Place
Finally, there's "Mise En Place," a concept I learned of in this podcast— In the podcast, Marie Forleo applies the French term to the art of preparing for the day ahead. It's about setting the stage, like a French chef laying out every ingredient and utensil before embarking on a recipe. So, if you wish for your morning routine to involve journaling and reading, you arrange the book, notebook, and pen, on the table the night before? For me, I look at my calendar and perpare the necessities for the day ahead. It's a simple act that has offered me a mental preview of the day ahead, setting a tone and creating a bridge into the morning routine.
